I did a bad thing. I went onto my local "confessions" page on FB. Every town has one and I think people like to make up a lot of crap. It's pure garbage, and I am actually embarrassed that I sunk to that level. I think it's garbage, really. I also think there are a lot of lonely people and a lot of sick, twisted people. Unfortunately, the posts I see repeatedly are posts of someone cheating on their significant other, usually with numerous other partners, knowing and unknowing the person is involved in a committed relationship. That, and "I could really use a friend right now" and posts of thinking about suicide.
I know this: The older we get and the more we all hide behind technology, the lonelier we become. I know that life is difficult, and it's easy to feel like you and you alone are failing at life. It seems like everyone and their dog (or cat, whatever your pet of choice) has it better than you. I know life can sometimes take us to a new town or city and it is SO damn hard to meet people. It IS lonely! Where on earth do you meet a nice guy (or girl) these days? Personally, if I were in the dating pool right now, I would probably rather not date at all, given the caliber of men I tend to meet these days. I may have got one of the last good ones. We think of the old faithful meeting places, like bars or church groups. 2 extreme ends of the spectrum. So in a small town, what does that leave us with?
I digress...sigh. My concern is the utter loneliness where people beg for attention to feel validated. When did it become okay to air that stuff so publicly? "Feel sorry for me! I'm sad and alone and I'm better off dead!" These are still "anonymous" posts but here they are, reaching out to a public online community with suicidal thoughts! Only to be bombarded with post of "quit attention grabbing, do it or get lost" which we all know is the wrong thing to say.
I have posted on this topic before. People, get help. Real help. It's not up for debate. There are hotlines and support groups and hell, Al-Anon will provide support to someone with thoughts of suicide. Your doctor, your urgent care or neighborhood clinic will get you resources to help you move forward! Someone in your life cares. Pick up the phone and talk to someone, anyone. Be real and face that you have an issue with someone who cares about you. Trust me. Someone (more likely a lot of someones) will miss you if you choose not to go on living.
DON'T go on a public forum/website/Facebook page and expect that the general public will support your depression! They won't. Some will. Humans, on a whole aren't bad. I like to think generally, we all want to be good people. But constantly seeing crap like this online makes the worst in some people come out fighting. Everyone has crap to deal with. Deal with it! There is a lot of real clinical depression out there and there are a lot of attention whores. I am not downplaying depression. I know it is a really tough battle to face. But for the bouts of loneliness and feelings of worthlessness that come from life's ups and downs, keep your biz-niz to yourself. Or? Call up a friend. Maybe it's long distance, but someone cares. You don't do yourself any favours by airing it to some place like Facebook. You only set yourself up for negative retaliation.
I urge you, BEG you, to consider being real. If you're having a bad day, shit, by all means, you are entitled to it! If you're having a bad week or a run of bad luck, reach out to people who love you and care about you. IT'S OKAY! None of us lead perfect lives, despite what it looks like online. If life is fantastic, great! Good for you! You deserve every ounce of happiness! If you really are considering thoughts of suicide, get help! No one wants to hear of your passing, especially that way. It is always true; it's been said once if not a million times "I had no idea", "I wish I had known", "Could I have done something?" never mind for a second what it would do to someone you actually knew, who loved you.
I am not dripping in friends, but I do have a handful of real ones. I know if I struggle, they are only a call away. I know there is at least one person out there who loves me. I'm fortunate to have a lot of love around me. I know who wants to know my shit to use it against me, and I know who I can spill my shit to, to regain a bit of perspective. We all have that. Trust yourself and your inner-most circle. And don't think you need to face your hardships alone.
I know this: The older we get and the more we all hide behind technology, the lonelier we become. I know that life is difficult, and it's easy to feel like you and you alone are failing at life. It seems like everyone and their dog (or cat, whatever your pet of choice) has it better than you. I know life can sometimes take us to a new town or city and it is SO damn hard to meet people. It IS lonely! Where on earth do you meet a nice guy (or girl) these days? Personally, if I were in the dating pool right now, I would probably rather not date at all, given the caliber of men I tend to meet these days. I may have got one of the last good ones. We think of the old faithful meeting places, like bars or church groups. 2 extreme ends of the spectrum. So in a small town, what does that leave us with?
I digress...sigh. My concern is the utter loneliness where people beg for attention to feel validated. When did it become okay to air that stuff so publicly? "Feel sorry for me! I'm sad and alone and I'm better off dead!" These are still "anonymous" posts but here they are, reaching out to a public online community with suicidal thoughts! Only to be bombarded with post of "quit attention grabbing, do it or get lost" which we all know is the wrong thing to say.
I have posted on this topic before. People, get help. Real help. It's not up for debate. There are hotlines and support groups and hell, Al-Anon will provide support to someone with thoughts of suicide. Your doctor, your urgent care or neighborhood clinic will get you resources to help you move forward! Someone in your life cares. Pick up the phone and talk to someone, anyone. Be real and face that you have an issue with someone who cares about you. Trust me. Someone (more likely a lot of someones) will miss you if you choose not to go on living.
DON'T go on a public forum/website/Facebook page and expect that the general public will support your depression! They won't. Some will. Humans, on a whole aren't bad. I like to think generally, we all want to be good people. But constantly seeing crap like this online makes the worst in some people come out fighting. Everyone has crap to deal with. Deal with it! There is a lot of real clinical depression out there and there are a lot of attention whores. I am not downplaying depression. I know it is a really tough battle to face. But for the bouts of loneliness and feelings of worthlessness that come from life's ups and downs, keep your biz-niz to yourself. Or? Call up a friend. Maybe it's long distance, but someone cares. You don't do yourself any favours by airing it to some place like Facebook. You only set yourself up for negative retaliation.
I urge you, BEG you, to consider being real. If you're having a bad day, shit, by all means, you are entitled to it! If you're having a bad week or a run of bad luck, reach out to people who love you and care about you. IT'S OKAY! None of us lead perfect lives, despite what it looks like online. If life is fantastic, great! Good for you! You deserve every ounce of happiness! If you really are considering thoughts of suicide, get help! No one wants to hear of your passing, especially that way. It is always true; it's been said once if not a million times "I had no idea", "I wish I had known", "Could I have done something?" never mind for a second what it would do to someone you actually knew, who loved you.
I am not dripping in friends, but I do have a handful of real ones. I know if I struggle, they are only a call away. I know there is at least one person out there who loves me. I'm fortunate to have a lot of love around me. I know who wants to know my shit to use it against me, and I know who I can spill my shit to, to regain a bit of perspective. We all have that. Trust yourself and your inner-most circle. And don't think you need to face your hardships alone.
No comments:
Post a Comment