How do you stay anonymous in an instant update kind of world? I haven't been on Facebook for weeks. Almost 2 months. Yes, I scroll through and find things of interest, but daily, I'm finding that to be a more impossible task. It's all, "How many likes for this utterly deformed child who doesn't think they're beautiful" or "1 Like=1 Prayer for all the dolphins being tortured" or "Elephant and kitten are BFF's, like if you agree" or my favorite "If you skip 'this post' you have no heart, 98% of my friends have no heart".
I miss cool pictures of people. I miss random status updates. I miss seeing what goes on with my friends and relatives that live far away and updates on their lives. I like to see the odd "inspirational quote" by Eleanor Roosevelt, but it probably came from Anne of Green Gables. I like how the Dalai Lama quotes things just like Will Smith. I like a good debate. I like commenting that I'm thinking of someone on their wall and that I miss them. I like updates from some of my favorite retailers and bands.
I dislike comments on every action a person has. "Julie is at Chinook Mall". "Julie is in a relationship" "Julie is single" "Julie stopped caring about shit" (Insert conversation and comments threads here). I LOVE the like button, but I wish they had a dislike button! I dislike public conversations and bullying and passive-aggressive comments and attention-getter-drama-starters. I remember back when FB first started how people were leery of being TOO open so a status update might look more like "Going out with friends tonight" rather than "Got a Brazilian done and condoms in the purse, gonna be a hot-mess tomorrow!" Really though, I could go on an on about dislikes; Google "status update pet peeves"; the list is endless.
So is there any way to stay out of the comments thing and still post your life without a barrage of trollers and live commentators on every action? Because I'll tell you what, the "unfriending" is a major insult, once the person realizes they're gone. The "Block" is even worse. The settings change as fast as underwear so regardless of what your settings are, you know they're getting all changed up in a week. And it's time consuming when changing those setting is person or picture specific and you're dealing in the hundreds of people. Too bad we can't pop up a "page under construction" banner and hide everything until our major surgery is completed. #thirdworldproblems, right? I know! I don't want to close the account because I do have family and friends across the country that I can see how fast their kids are growing and how so & so is having her first baby and I can't share it live with them or how this person got married on the other side of the country and I couldn't make it but I saw pictures. I feel bad unfriending and blocking because I added them and it seemed like a good idea at the time and it's taken so personally. It sucks.
I've always said I'd love to be a fly on the wall.... okay, maybe a butterfly; they're prettier and less diseased. I'm there. I see. I experience. Once in a while I'll settle onto the centerpiece and make myself known. I'll let you into my life sometimes if you don't bug me constantly. I'll share my ups and try not to share my downs too dramatically. I'll make you smile or make you think or post on your wall that I miss you, sending you a hug. I'll comment on a great picture, but we can chat in my inbox. I'll probably miss your birthday; I always miss birthdays. So Happy Birthday.
Here is my public pledge:
I promise to post enough to keep you abreast on what is going on with me. I promise to make you laugh, share insights and pictures of me and my family and my life. I promise my page is me and not a multiple of me by me or anyone else. Those who know me know how I am and those who think they do can leave if they find me offensive. I promise my private life has nothing to do with my work life, and I would rather not engage in work conversation on my private page or my inbox. I promise to let you know when I've stopped by to say hello. I promise we will talk...in my inbox or yours.
I promise I will never post chain letters/pictures, *force my causes (see footnote) on you or "share" every post I come across. I will not post where I am, every time I am somewhere even if it's the bathroom at the Saddledome which makes you so envious you can taste it because I'm at that wicked concert you wish you were at. I will not judge you or your fall-down drunk pics or your drunk status updates. I may judge you on your illegal behavior, illicit posts about how much of a slut you are, where to buy weed or multiple weed-smoking pics, bottle-ballin' and bags of green at 14 years old. So may your future employers. Or your family. Or the cops. And for the love of- young men and women (like teen-young) should be so much more cautious of those naked pics you post! Get a grip, get a life, get some clothes on!
*By forcing my causes, one should assume multiple posts and news feed clogging. Amendment includes the right to post "raising money for _______ please support me" or "like if you support _______" but I will never post something that assumes that a lack of "likes" insists on a lack of heart, belief or opinion. I will never rally for a cause and make claim that you have less compassion for not supporting my cause.
Maybe I'll join the dark side of FB again and start posting my stuff. I do miss my friends and my family. I miss commenting on a cute or stunning pic of your kids or family. I miss seeing where you were at on your last vacation. I miss random comments from my friends on some of my activity. For the dish on life as I see it, the rest of that will be posted on here, going forward. I will always link it from my page but you can comment or not, read or ignore... it's just there, as I am; the butterfly on the wall.
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